Life as a Chain of Choices

Who doesn’t want to feel good about themselves, and what is going on in their life?  Yet, many times something pops up in what others may say or think about us that brings us to a low point, and we wonder what life is all about.  Some of us may even wonder if life is worth living. When we reach that point, and, let’s face it, most of us have at some time in our life, it forces us to re-assess where we are and how we got to that place.  For many of us, that is not easy to do, for we have been taught to act and present ourselves as something we are not. So how exactly do we regroup and move forward in life with joy or, if need be, without the thought of escaping life in some form?

Most of us arrive on earth howling at the indignity of being forced to leave a warm, nurturing space into an outside world of bright lights and noise. Soon, things begin to get better as we are being held and loved, allowing us the freedom to become curious about everything around us. As we grow and can move around a bit and voice our needs, we soon are steeped into watching and responding to others’ reactions regarding what we do or say. Those reactions then become deep-seated as to how we conduct our lives – whether to please or displease. Much of the time, we try to please others, and at other times we displease as a subconscious reaction to our own needs not being met. So, where does all of this lead?

Having come into this earth plane from a space of unconditional love and acceptance, we find ourselves at odds with our true self when we step outside of who we really are to search for unconditional love and acceptance from others.  As long as we look to others to provide that, we will never have it. We can’t truly accept unconditional love and acceptance from anyone else unless we feel that way about ourselves. That becomes harder and harder the more we are exposed to what society throws our way in what they present as the ideal – excessive money, power, beauty – all the things that most people in this world will never have. We are taught by society and through social media that we will never have enough money, power, or beauty – those things are reserved only for a few. That leads many of us to believe we must not deserve them and creates a sense of “lack” within ourselves, making it easy to push away gratitude for all the good things we do have in our life.

Understanding why many of us perform in society as a response to others’ reactions to what we do and say can free us to make different choices.  We no longer have to be restricted and focused on pleasing others.  We are empowered to explore our own talents and gifts to do things differently and succeed if we believe we have the right to be our own person – one that deserves all the best life has to offer. If you aren’t feeling good about yourself or things aren’t working out in your life the way you want them, it is time to choose differently.  Remember, life is simply a chain of choices.  Make one small choice in the direction you want, add another, then another is how you get to the place you want, one choice at a time. If you are escaping life and are trapped in a cycle of drinking alcohol or taking drugs or both, you may think there is no way out, and you are stuck in that emptiness that can only be eradicated when it is filled by loving life.  But the reality of it all is that all you need to do is make one choice not to drink or drug and then add another until it becomes a chain of choices to become addiction free. That is the beauty of life as a chain of choices. As you climb up that ladder of being addiction free, you are better able to look at life differently and see how exquisite it is to experience what it has to offer.  Believe, trust, and make it happen.

“I have found that if you love life, life will love you back.” – Arthur Rubinstein