Whether we know it or not, we each have a box within our mind where we stuff away some of our thoughts, ideas, dreams, fears, and prejudices. We started when we were young, not even aware of doing it. It could have been something like your fear of water, or an old saying such as “if you step on a crack, you break your mother’s back,” or the idea that you’re not successful unless you are rich, or the belief that you’ll never amount to anything, or the dream of becoming a doctor despite coming from a low-income family, or so many other things. Those thoughts or ideas we unwittingly hold onto and have held close have influenced our way of living.

Do you believe your hopes and dreams cannot become real, so it is best not to bring them out of your box? Do you feel your prejudices are the only way to think? Have you allowed whatever you have put into your box to stay there without thought or review, or are they stuck there because you are unwilling to see them differently?

Maybe it is time you look inside your box to see what you have placed inside and whether any of them are worth keeping. Time sheds new light and perspective on our life experiences, so those beliefs, prejudices, hopes, and dreams may not be the same today as when you put them inside…yet they remain there.

Sometimes, it takes courage to look inside your box. Most humans don’t like change, nor do we like to be wrong about anything. We’ll fight to the end to prove our thoughts are the only way for people to think or act.

Once you take the leap and open your box, you may be surprised that it contains more negative than positive ideas and beliefs. When you consider each thought or belief, you must evaluate whether those destructive ones have become a part of who you are. This review can be painful, but when you study them, you will realize that the negative ones are based on fear, and by exposing them as that, they lose their fearfulness and power.

By exploring your box, you can tell how you live your life. Do you live like the glass is half-empty or half-full? By releasing some of what you have stuffed into your thought box that no longer serves you, you will find yourself feeling freer and less burdened in your everyday living.

This is a crucial time in our history when every thought matters. It has become so easy to blame everyone and everything for anything negative in our lives that we feel we have no power over how we live. We have forgotten that it is us alone that creates how we live. Our life is nothing more or less than a chain of our choices. Knowing this, it’s a time to get out a broom, open your mind box, sweep out what no longer suits you, and live the way you want with love, peace, gratitude, and happiness.

JOAN S. PECK is an editor and author of short stories, spiritual books, and novels and a contributing author in several anthologies. She served as former Editor in Chief for Chic Compass magazine, an international magazine based in Las Vegas.

Joan is a writer of both non-fiction and fiction books. She first began writing in 2008 as an author of spiritual non-fiction books. Prime Threat Shattering the Power of Addiction, written with her son after his death in 2005, won a Top Shelf Book Award Nominee.

Nine years later, she published her first fiction books under the pen name J.S. Peck and won a Top Pick for Spirited Woman for Death on the Strip, the first book of her six-book mystery Death Card Series. Through her strong, likable characters, Joan has become known for expressing addiction and human sex trafficking concerns throughout her fiction books. She has an extraordinary writing ability filled with humor and tenderness that brings readers into each book’s storyline, holding them hostage until the end.

Her books are available on all book sites, and her website (Writing with Soul) – www.JoanSPeck.com

With all the name-calling and things taken out of context and spread across social media, where does that leave the truth? Has it become that truth is left like beauty “in the eyes of the beholder,” or is there more to it?

Although there is such a thing as perspective and seeing things from one’s own viewpoint, how does that work when dealing with others demanding only their way of seeing things or the highway?

We have reached a divide that is ever deepening within our country today, leaving all of us bewildered by knowing that the truth in most situations is murky. We no longer trust those in power to speak the whole truth. Indeed, we have seen this repeatedly demonstrated in high-profile tweets that twist any situation to override the facts and real happenings to prevent personal degradation.

That worries me.

Have we become so lazy that it is easier to believe an untruth rather than seek the truth by looking into a situation from many different angles and reaching our own conclusions? Or is it easier to accept negative thoughts and ideas that brew violence?

Some of us today seem to get a thrill from downgrading another person without seeking the truth. They are the discontents of the world, pursuing satisfaction from hurting someone else—a dark side to human beings that brings out the “beast” in us.

We see that when children and adults get bullied. They are picked upon by someone who feels threatened in some way. The bully starts the taunting … but never alone. Bullies always gather others around them, calling out disparaging, hurtful things, and untruths, leaving the one bullied with little recourse to make things right. From there, it can escalate into physical violence. And we all know what that can lead to—broken hearts and even death.

Listen to the news or scan social media, and you can see the massive, unending misinformation that exists today. Truth doesn’t stand a chance.

Is it truth to speak ill of another person? Is it truth to steal from another? Is it truth to physically hurt someone else? Is it truth to threaten or take another’s life for having a different stance or opinion?

We will never realize our TRUTH unless we can understand and accept that we are all one.

It is simple, really. Everything is energy … every single thing … coming from one source. We all are connected by being part of that same source of energy. What one does to another, one does to all.

Truth is knowing that our purpose in life is to act in the energy of love, show kindness and consideration to another, and allow differences of opinion without threat. Truth is loving ourselves enough to be in harmony with the Universe. Truth is living the best we can to model our good words and actions to all children who depend upon us for protection against malice. That is our TRUTH.

Those of us who have experienced the 1950s and the somewhat naïve living portrayed on television with shows like “Father Knows Best,” “Leave It to Beaver,” and “The Donna Reed Show” are dismayed at how far we’ve departed from what they represented. For many, those shows highlighted the importance of loving and spending time with your family and reaffirming manners and etiquette.

Men held doors for women; we played and got along with the other kids in our neighborhood because they were our neighbors; we watched over the elderly by carrying their groceries, mowing their lawns, and shoveling snow for them, and without any formality, a neighborhood watch existed because everyone watched out for everyone else at that time. If we did something we shouldn’t be doing, it was reported to our parents without them becoming defensive. Right was right, and wrong was wrong …. unlike today.

Today, few seem to own up to the consequences of their own making. Today, our society lives in the shadows, where people do not live their highest good, where the unacceptable has become acceptable. We live in fear. If those in power don’t like what we have to say, we are threatened with retaliation. Because of social media, anyone can say, do, and threaten another person or group without proper guidelines or consequences. Truth is often wholly misrepresented, and the unhappy, discontented folks grab onto the lies to ease their anger or sense of powerlessness or injustice.

We have fostered the false idea that our children are or should be perfect and no one is a loser; for example, whether their sports team wins or not, they are still winners. We have modeled for our children a sense of feeling slighted if they don’t constantly receive praise for whatever they do, even cleaning up their room or taking out the garbage, even though it is their responsibility. We have demonstrated and allowed our children to believe that if something doesn’t go their way, it is someone’s fault … not their own.

We want to blame anyone but ourselves for things that have happened in our lives, not to our liking. We are unwilling to accept responsibility for where we are in life, and therein lies one of the problems. We have forgotten that life is a chain of choices … made by us. Only we are responsible for the choices we make.

One of the most significant downfalls from softer times is that no one is allowed to disagree with another without staking a side. Instead, we want others to agree with whatever we believe, period. We demand consensus for whatever we express. If not, those who disagree with us become our enemies. We name-call, ridicule, and humiliate our enemies, and some go so far as to threaten their health and lives for not agreeing with them. We fail to acknowledge that differences exist to broaden our perspective from a different angle, and we need that to grow and expand our horizons.

So, where does that leave you and me? If we, along with everyone else, would sit, relax, and let our minds connect to our inner energy … the soul energy… we would rediscover the knowledge that we are all one and understand that anything negative we do to another affects us all.

The good news? The reverse is true as well. Anything positive we do for another affects us all as well. When that happens, the love energy … the highest energy … of what you’ve done with kindness spreads love into the ether and around us all. And it doesn’t take much, either. It can be a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, and so much more. All it takes is for us to think before we take action.

We need to claim the power of love and change the world. We can do it!

Resilience meant so many more things to me when I was younger. Now when I think of the word resilience or its meaning of flexibility, the first thought that flashes through my mind is whether someone, particularly my age, has the ability to easily bend down and touch their toes — and get back up again! That is what age can do for you! It’s all about perspective, right?

But I know better than that. That ability to be flexible and zag when zig doesn’t work out plays a large part in our life from the time we are born to our last breath. It all boils down to how well we recover from difficult situations — no matter how minor.

We begin to get a glimpse of a child’s ability to be irrepressible early on when someone takes a toy away from him. We then have the opportunity to see if he is adaptable and is able to find a substitute or merely sits there intractable unable to get beyond having had someone remove a pleasure from him. From our early days to now, we are tested on how we choose to life. We all receive many opportunities to demonstrate our resiliency and to overcome adversity. That is life.

Resilience is about our ability to withstand, deal, and recover from difficult situations. We are left to do that each time we have a dream destroyed or a loved one passes. Even the smaller trials in life can have a profound effect on us. Personally for me, I find that humor helps — if not my own, someone else’s.

Here is a great story I read about Kevin Cotter that brought a smile:

“In 2009, after 12 years of marriage, Cotter’s wife divorced him, leaving behind only her wedding dress. Heartbroken and confused, Cotter asked his departing wife what he was supposed to do with the gown. Her reply? Whatever he wanted.

“Cotter took his ex’s suggestions to heart and started the blog, My Ex-Wife’s Wedding Dress in 2011, where he documented over a hundred alternative uses he found for the piece. Cotter’s creations spanned from the silly to the utilitarian. The dress has seen new life as a kite, Halloween costume, hammock, oven mitt, jump rope and more.

The jilted husband’s journey to transform his ex’s parting gift became so popular that it was recently turned into the book 101 Uses for My Ex-Wife’s Wedding Dress. Now, with his creative energy exhausted, Cotter has turned the focus of his blog to a different subject: his life with his new wife and kids.”

I guess for me each time I hit a bump in the road, I’d like to think I’ve learned how to have more grace as I get back up on my feet again.  There’s also something to be said about appreciating the journey. But one thing is for sure, life is never without challenges and the opportunity to overcome them, and it’s always interesting to see what that looks like.

“Resilience isn’t a single skill. It’s a variety of skills and coping mechanisms. To bounce back from bumps in the road as well as failures, you should focus on emphasizing the positive.” Jean Chatzky

“She stood in the storm and when the wind did not blow her way, she adjusted her sails.” Elizabeth Edwards

Let’s face it!  We are experiencing a very messy, angry way of living today with so many societies throughout the world in conflict with each other as well as individuals at odds with others within each of those societies.  I would like to say that this upheaval is something new but, unfortunately, it’s not.

As humans we have a propensity to gather negativity like furious little cancer cells that race to make a small irritation one large mass of anger and upset causing us to destroy good thoughts and deeds.  We even get caught up in power struggles between what one person believes vs. another’s belief.  We stubbornly hold unto our own ideas without any willingness to look at a different perspective which doesn’t allow for a broadening of knowledge which can create a greater chance for resolution.

Right now the most notable happening in our country is the presidential election which has provided the opportunity for us to shout hate slogans; accuse people of doings without proof; encourage harm done to those who don’t agree with us; excuse behavior so unbecoming that it hinges on lunacy; lose the sense of propriety that different perspectives should require, and lay blame on anyone but ourselves for our discontent.

And we humans LOVE all of this upheaval!  People haven’t become this engaged in what is going on around them in quite a while and it’s mostly due to the dark, negativity that abounds.  And we keep demanding more and more of this low energy because it is easier to hate than to love, which makes us a very lazy society indeed.

It’s hard to fully escape what is happening due to all the social media in place today.  The most disheartening thing for me to have seen on television was an average-looking family (mom, dad and two small children) wearing tee shirts with a slogan of hate written across it standing together in a crowd of protesters raising their fists in anger and shouting their slogan for all to see and hear.  Spittle flying and loud shouting must have been what caused the little girl to look up at her mother in confusion.  Sensing her dismay, her mother reached down and lifted her arm to show her how to shake it in anger.  The child had no real idea of what was going on or why but unwittingly was being taught her first step in developing blameful anger toward anyone who did not agree with her.  Hate begetting hate.

How can anyone find peace amid all of what is going on in our country and the rest of the world?  I can only share with you how I have come to be successful in finding my own peace.

• First of all, I try to avoid social media or talk with another that has anything to do with the election for it is hard to dismiss that negative energy after entertaining it for it becomes like gum to a shoe.  It sticks around for a while.
• The second thing I do is meditate to remind myself to let go of the idea that it is my responsibility to try to change anyone’s mind toward my own beliefs, not allowing them their own perspective.  In other words, I need to allow each person their own path in thinking and doing.  My role is to keep the faith that all will work out as it should.
• The third thing that I do on a daily basis is to say my “gratitudes” – all the things I am grateful for which by doing so automatically raises my energy to the highest level of love.  When I am in that space of awareness of all the beauty that surrounds me and all the positive things in my life, I no longer have the desire to entertain anything less.  I know I am blessed no matter my circumstances.
• The last thing I do is repeat my mantra.  To be completely at peace with myself and all the craziness that surrounds me, I developed a mantra that I repeat each night before I go to bed – “I send love and blessings to each and every one.  May we know and feel the love of God and know in our hearts we are all connected – all one – and treat each other the way we want to be treated.”

There is so much stress for everyone living today that it becomes essential to do what is necessary to climb out of our rabbit holes and find our peace within.  For each of us that may be different.  I only know that my rituals have helped me and continue to do so as long as I stick with them. Perhaps they will bring you peace as well.

Ego says, “Once everything falls into place, I’ll feel peace.”  Spirit says, “Find your peace, then everything will fall into place.” – Marianne Williamson

“Peace comes within.  Do not seek it without.” – Gautama Buddha